Autoblog UK

When I found a family of mice feasting on my breakfast cereal in the kitchen cupboard, I thought that was probably the worst thing that could ever happen to my house. I felt my sacred ground had been invaded by uninvited, disgusting little squatters. Even now, months after they've departed, I can still hear the sound of the munching at night and have to rock myself to sleep.

When I see what some other less fortunate people have to put up with, I put things in perspective and complain less. Some people are invaded by drink-drivers and their cars. Like the Australian couple whose bathroom wall was destroyed by a car which lost control and ploughed into their house.

That was already bad enough, but the misfortunes of the Melbourne homeowners didn't end there. The car broke a gas pipe which caught fire – the blaze was put out very quickly, but not quickly enough to save the house from being nicely baked all over. Whatever wasn't destroyed by the fire and smoke got soaked by the firemen's powerful hoses.

The poor couple are now between a rock and a hard place - do they sit where its burnt or where it's wet? And it's not like they can have a nice bath to relax, what with having no hot water or bathroom wall.

Britons are renowned for their love of the car - our overclogged streets and motorways bear testament to that. But now it seems we're actually a nation of caraholics who will get up to just about anything in the comforts - or confines - of our four-wheeled friends.

Yes, it seems the great British drivers just can't wait to get their clothes - and their rocks - off while behind the wheel. A new survey by online insurers who shall remain nameless and who clearly have too much time on their hands, has shown that more than two-thirds (67%) of us have had sex in our cars with almost half (49%) of us having automotive sex more than twice. They don't say if the respondants were actually on the move or not whilst joining the 67-percenters club although the way some people suddenly change lanes on the motorway these days who knows what's going on in their nether regions.

And how does the company concerned link this to car cover? Here's their marketing director: "With Brits spending so much of their time behind the wheel, it's no surprise that many relationships begin, blossom or even end on four wheels. However, as a responsible insurer, [we] would like to point out that drivers should always concentrate on the road ahead otherwise it would invalidate your car insurance cover." So, now you know.

Is this Carry On-style jape scraping the bottom of a very deep barrel and have we just played swiftly into their hands? Of course. Now, where's my commission?

The VW Beetle, the Mini and the Fiat 500 are all brilliant examples of small cars from the good old days that have gained an ever-increasing number of new admirers and buyers after relaunch. The retro trend has been a resounding success for those manufacturers. The next cult car is now in the pipeline. Citroen are to resurrect the 2CV, better known as the 'Duck'. Around five million examples of the Duck sold worldwide between 1948 and 1990. In truth, there's not much left of the old body shape but at first sight, the car looks very zippy. The Citroen DS2's design is largely based on the REVOLTe concept car that so fascinated visitors to September's Frankfurt Motor Show. The treatment of the rear holds the greatest nostalgia value for former fans – it's very accomplished. The lack of a roll-up roof is sure to be addressed in a future model. Expected price is a not unreasonable 13,000 euros, (around £11,700).

The centenary celebrations for the Audi marque are set to end with quite a climax. On 30th November, the new Audi A8 makes its debut in the unusual location of Miami. The latest flagship model will be displayed in innovative fashion in the Audi Pavilion, which is functioning as a temporary art gallery. The premiere is to be combined with an art opening themed as 'The Art of Progress'. The Florida metropolis of Miami long ago established a reputation as a centre of art and design. Early December is traditionally the high point of the season for all connoisseurs, with the staging of two high-calibre art fairs, Design Miami and Art Basel Miami Beach. And in this rarefied setting, the Audi A8 is due to be unveiled on the eve of the Design Miami show.

If you're looking for an unusual Christmas decoration, Porsche Gelderland in the small Dutch town of Heteren could provide you with some inspiration. The local dealership has had a Porsche 911 Carrera 4S completely coated in chocolate. Master chocolatier Jan Blancken melted 175 kilos of the stuff and used it to covert the bodywork of the Porsche. For good measure, he spread a few kilos of white chocolate onto the headlights. The photo gallery shows each stage of the creation of this masterpiece which is set to decorate the showroom in the run-up to Christmas. The Porsche has 385 horsepower tucked away under its sweet bonnet. The technical specification of the brown racer will now presumably have to be supplemented with its calorie count.

Porsche have always operated on the basic principle of supplying thoroughbred driving machines to motoring purists. This is particularly true of the legendary RS models. In its latest incarnation as the 911 GT3 RS, a member of the revamped 997 series, Porsche have once again demonstrated a sense for what is essential, giving customers the option of a lithium-ion battery which, by comparison with the conventional lead battery, offers a weight saving of over ten kilos. However, it seems that they are unable to resist making compromises: electric windows, automatic climate control and radio come as standard. You can specifically 'unorder' the radio and climate control to get closer to the ideal of the unadulterated racer. But why on earth would anyone want electrically operated windows, electrically adjustable mirrors, electric unlocking on bonnet and boot, and central locking? Away with this clutter! Dear Porsche, your new RS is great, but spare us all the gimmicks with this definitive 911. The softies at the luxury end of the market can always buy themselves a Bentley.

Since 2004, a string of muscle cars from the sixties and seventies have been making a comeback. Mustangs, Challengers and Camaros can again be found in places other than America. Iconic names bristling with new technology sell well. All that's actually still missing is a retro version of the Firebird, Pontiac's last great cult car.

In 2009, General Motors announced Pontiac's demise due to the worldwide economic crisis. Unfortunately for fans, there won't be a successor to the Firebird. But in the USA, there's one customizer itching to turn dreams into reality. For many years, drag racer John Lingenfelter has belonged to the cream of the US tuning scene. At the SEMA show in Las Vegas, the Indiana-based tuner displayed a Pontiac 455 T/A built on Chevrolet Camaro underpinnings. Lingenfelter intends to gauge the public's response before finally deciding whether to put the Firebird into production. One thing in favour of this relaunch must surely be the performance of the V8 engine under the shaker scoop that should put out 655bhp.

Don't know what to get your other half/little one/gran/in-laws for Christmas? Look no further, here's a present that would make anyone happy: a road kill calendar.

The gory little number, featuring foxes, badgers and other woodland creatures has been released just in time for Christmas and is supposedly a massive hit already.

The "artist" behind this delightful idea is a Mr Kevin Beresford. The 57-year-old man travelled the UK for a while, stopping at gruesome sights of dead animals and snapping away.

He claims having received a large amount of orders already and believes the provoking photos are a refreshing change to the usual calendar material: "I think customers are fed up with Peter Andre's six-pack and want something different. It's good to push the boundaries" he adds.

Now it's really a matter of taste. Which do you prefer checking out over your morning coffee? Peter Andre? Or a pureed badger?

The motorsport great John Surtees has become the first person to drive a sports car through the channel tunnel during a charity stunt. The drive was one of the events celebrating the 15th anniversary of the tunnel's opening.

The 1964 Formula 1 winner, who is still the only person to have claimed world records on both 2 and 4 wheels, drove an electric powered Ginetta G50 EV through the 31-mile tunnel.

He didn't break any speed records this time though as he had to stick to the 50km/h speed limit.

What didn't help with keeping a good time was also his constant stopping to have a closer look at the tunnel, which he called "a tremendous engineering feat".

"You certainly wouldn't want to be subject to any claustrophobic feelings down there.The tunnel is very small in parts," added the 75-year-old after eventually resurfacing in Coquelles, France.

Organisers of the Los Angeles Auto Show invited design studios based in Southern California to set out their vision for Mobile Teens in 2030 (Youthmobile 2030). Studies were drawn up by design studios at General Motors, Audi, Honda, Nissan, Mazda and Toyota. 2009 is the sixth year that this Design Challenge has been held. The winner will be announced on Press Day at the Los Angeles Auto Show, 2nd and 3rd December 2009.

Car Hero by General Motors can drive itself and is steered by mobile phone (that's if they are still around in 2030). Audi designers submitted two very bold design studies, the eSpira and the eOra, that are guided to their destination by hand movements (not a good idea for those of us who are not at our best in the mornings but nevertheless need to get to work). Nissan's V2G is an eco-friendly electrically powered car. This e-car has an aerodynamic egg shape and six wheels. In Mazda's Souga, the car's two occupants sit diagonally behind one another. According to its designers, buyers of the Souga will configure the car to suit their needs. Both Nissan and Toyota designers believe that, in 2030, vehicles travelling in the rush hour will often be joined together in groups of two or more. The Toyota's appearance can be digitally altered and tyre friction converted back into energy.